Your Life Calling You Today

Your Life Calling TODAY with Jane Pauley is a series of human interest stories of people making drastic career and life changes later in life. The series is sponsored by AARP and runs on the Today Show. I’ve caught a few of them while getting dressed for work in the morning.

Although the series is aimed at baby boomers (those born 1943-1960), I believe that anyone can glean from these pearls of wisdom. It is a reminder that no matter where you are in life, reinvention is always an option. If you find yourself unhappy, bored, depressed, unmotivated, lost or unchallenged – do something about it. It’s your life.

Even for a young graduate making their way in the world, you may feel 100% sure about what you want to do for the rest of your life. Just keep in mind that with experience, events, knowledge and time - one day you may feel 100% sure that you no longer want to do that very thing that you were once 100% sure about. If you are young and you have no idea what you want to do, there’s nothing wrong with that either. You don't have to feel pressured into selecting the perfect job for friggin forever!     

Here are some of my favorite quotes from Rick Rittmaster whose life was calling him.  View his story here. 

If we are feeding our soul it is going to be green and vibrant and growing.  If we are not engaged in the alignment of things that really give us life we dry out.

I didn't have a plan or a roadmap but I was committed to paying attention. 

As odd as it may sound, to me it was full of God's grace.  I got to exercise my gifts and skills in a way that I never could have envisioned before.

Is your life calling and will you answer? 

TGIF (Thank God It's Fall)

Fall is my favorite season. I like everything about the Fall. The colors, the coolness and the start of the holiday season. My favorite holiday, Thanksgiving, is in the Fall. It is the one holiday where nobody really wants anything from anybody other than their love, friendship and maybe their food.

I enjoy walking in the Fall. I like the chill in the air and the crunchy sound of leaves beneath my feet. There’s this wonderful woodsy smell in the air that shows up in the Fall. I expect the alluring sweetness of the Spring vegetation. Yet, I’m still surprised that its Fall decay also provides a welcoming and pleasant aroma.

I cannot endure to waste anything as precious as autumn sunshine by staying in the house. So I spend almost all the daylight hours in the open air. - Nathaniel Hawthorne 

One of my favorite walking places is Arabia Mountain. I mean walking in a Henry David Thoreau kind of way. The trail goes on forever behind neighborhoods, into woods, alongside streams and amidst wildflowers. I’ve gone there with my walking buddy Arlene. We talk, we walk and pause to admire a flower, leaf or tree. I’m not one to walk trails alone mostly for safety reasons.  Besides, I tend to get creeped out rather easily. Alone, any of nature’s sounds trigger a sensation that something is after me -  like a Freddy Krueger or a crazed wild boar frothing at the mouth.

An early-morning walk is a blessing for the whole day. - Henry David Thoreau 

I like the sense of transition that Fall brings. As children, my mother would send us on several trips to the basement to retrieve our Fall and Winter clothing. My mother would also take down her light and summery yellow and white kitchen curtains. I remember watching their whimsical movements against the air when the windows were open. In the Fall, their brown and white replacements were sturdy and protective against that same air.  In my own way, I do the same. I move clothes from one bedroom to another. I place a Fall wreath on the front door and just below, two planters full of mums.

Autumn - the reprieve from Summer. - Mike Garofalo

I like that things are coming to a close. I’m grateful for the seasons of life. We need things to begin. We need things to end.  And Fall is that reminder.  Thank God for the Fall.

Autumn, the year's last, loveliest smile. - William Cullen Bryant 

Arabia Mountain Trail - Fall 2010

Winter is an etching, spring a watercolor, summer an oil painting and autumn a mosaic of them all. - Stanley Horowitz 

To Die All Alone

Karen, I really don’t want you to die all alone. This is what someone at work has said to me way too many times. Let’s call her Gladys. I’m always stumped when Gladys says this to me. I guess I look stumped because Gladys always adds, I’m serious Karen, I think you are attractive and a very nice lady and I would really hate for you to end up all alone. Oh, that’s better. I feel so much better now.

Gladys and I talk about a number of things at work, including men.  Gladys loves to ask me about my dating life. I would liken it to the way a parent checks in on their child about homework– especially the child that has proven that she does not like homework. I think Gladys wants to keep dating on the forefront of my mind. She’s actually told me that I’m not trying hard enough to meet someone. She says this in a not so jokingly way. She’s sort of laughing but her expression lacks humor. Her eyes are a bit narrowed as she looks me up and down.

Much later in the day, I try to come up with some great one-liners to shut Gladys up. After 2.5 minutes, I give up. I give up because I would rather be doing something else. I give up because I won’t remember that particular one-liner in the moment. There are many one-liners that naturally come to mind in the moment. None of these would be appropriate in a professional setting. Besides, I like Gladys. She isn’t the anti-Christ.

What do people generally mean when they say that they don’t want to die all alone? I’ve never thought about dying alone. I don’t spend much time thinking about dying except when I’m about to board an airplane. Even in the midst of turbulence, I’m pretty resolved that death would be pretty quick. But anyway, I’ve never associated being unmarried with dying alone. Maybe the phrase holds no more value than the words of a dumb donkey.

Dying alone could mean that when I take my very last breath on this earth, I will not have a husband sitting bedside, lovingly looking into my eyes as tears slowly fall from his eyes. If that’s what dying alone means - than most people, regardless of their relationship status, will die alone. If one were to look at the statistics, women outlive men by 5-10 years. This applies throughout the world. This means that most women, throughout the world, will definitely die alone.

Dying alone could mean that I will live the rest of my life without being married or partnered in some way. So, in a weird way, Gladys and others aren’t talking about dying but living alone, especially as I enter the Fall and Winter of my life. I guess this is where the image comes in of a woman alone in a house with a bunch of cats. I’ve never thought that securing a boyfriend, partner or husband was an unattainable feat. However, to be in a healthy, stable, and lasting relationship with two like-minded individuals with similar values…that just might take awhile. I admit it might take some longer than others especially if they aren’t just dying to be married.

And just the other day, several weeks after I started writing about this, Gladys and I were talking. This time, it was actually about work. As I turned to leave her office she says to me, Wait a minute Karen, now just hold up…just what is going on with your dating! This time, I whipped myself around. I leaned over her and with the crazy face said, I know Gladys, I know…you just don’t want me to die all alone! I get it!!! Rather meekly, Gladys says, Well…I’m sorry Karen…I didn’t mean to offend you. I’m sorry. She looked confused.  I gave her one last look.  Regally, I turned and walked out the door.